we're blogging at a bar
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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