Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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