I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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