guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
