Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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