"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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