This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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