did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
