I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
