i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
The uberlube is also flammable
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize