How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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