Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
