I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize