Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
