Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
