These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
