I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
