DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
