You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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