i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I need to calm my uterus...
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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