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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
