my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Randomize
