I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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