I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Don't make out with my wife yet
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
sex in a hospital.. check
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
