Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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