we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize