We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
