If i come over, it means nothing
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
