After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
