I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
