Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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