AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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