I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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