a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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