Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
