TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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