There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
