brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Come see our sink grown plant.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Randomize
