id be glad to
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
