Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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