thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
