Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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