Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
