just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
