Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize