I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Randomize
