I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
