where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
