whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
