love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
