I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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