even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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