Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I have post one night stand depression
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